Doing the Whole 30

The Whole 30

This past Monday I started a detox program (for lack of a better term) for the next 30 days.  I promised I would give a progress report on how I'm doing.

Still sorta sucking, but I am seeing the benefits already.

I've cut out processed sugar, grains, dairy, beans and caffeine.  I guess caffeine wasn't required, but I figured, why not. I had a glass of green tea yesterday and rambled like a loon.  I think it impacts me more than most people.

Before you get all "Mama Bean you need to eat a balanced diet...."  trust me, I am.  I am eating fruits, vegetables, proteins-- all good.  I am getting fiber from the fruits and veggies.  This isn't a bacon-bacon- and more bacon diet (not that I wouldn't love that).  My breath doesn't stink.  I don't have gas.

I am, however, very tired, still.  I don't look radiant quite yet.  And I'm well, a little pissy.

I should have known that this would work.  I was very food-sensitive as a kid.  Not highly allergic to anything in particular, but I had reactions to chocolate and dairy a lot.  I thought I had "grown out of it."  It's not looking that way.

I have lost a LOT of water weight just this first week.  I can tell, if no one else can.  It's like I'm deflating.  I am peeing like I'm pregnant.  No, it's not fat loss, but that's really not what this is about.  It's about correcting my insulin levels in hopes that this is what my issue is.

My clothes are noticeably loose.  I had tightened up after Crossfit, but was hesistant to buy new clothes.  I can wear clothes a size too big-- no problem.  It makes me feel thin (regardless of the size, of course!)  I have a feeling in 3 weeks, that won't be an option.  Especially where the weight is coming off.

My hips, stomach and upper arms are shrinking.  Clothes that were tight or fit last Saturday are looser.  I have on a t-shirt and the arms are loose.  They were tight the last time I wore it. I  put on a t-shirt for my tap class on Thursday and it easily fell over my hips and butt.

I'm tracking what I'm eating in my food journal and here's the interesting part-- it's the same or more than the Weight Watchers points.  My fat is higher.  Yet, the weight is coming off-- again, I know it's mostly water weight at this point.

It's a bit freaky, honestly.  It's enough to keep me motivated to keep going.

This isn't something designed to keep doing.  At the end of the 30 days, I reintroduce foods back in, one at a time.  The ones I react to, I will avoid (not necessarily eliminate entirely, but know that there are consequences to eating it).  The ones I have no issue with, I will put back in in healthy portions.  If I had to guess, sugar and dairy are gone.  I don't think I have an issue with gluten.  I honestly don't eat enough bread and pasta to make it an issue.  I do love ice cream.  And yogurt.  And all things dairy.  But we'll see.  

I always joke that I'm the 2%-- no, not the wealthy folks, but the 2% that always have a reaction to medication.  When the studies say "2% of the population developed a rash from taking...." I will get a rash from holding the bottle.  Any time my doctor prescribes something I ask "What are the side effects?"  She'll go through them.  I plan for them.  And it's not suggestive illness, either.  I'll have a reaction, read the label and TADA--- "Less than 1% of people tested, suffered from intestinal gas...."

So it's not a surprise that I might be sensitive to food.  When I was a kid I was told that I had a sensitive system.  I was the baby who could projectile vomit across a room.  Apparently, not a lot has a changed.  I just turned the puke into belly fat, which caused more imbalance, etc, etc.

I should also point out that at no time have I ever tested negatively for any imbalance.  My blood sugar has crept up over the years- but I'm still normal.  When I was having "girl issues" a few years ago, my gyno tested me and said I was still in the normal range, but clearly something was going on. She also pointed out that normal is determined by quantifying 80% of a population.  Normal didn't necessarily equal healthy.  Additionally, I could have started out at the 20th percentile and moved to the 80th-- still normal, but not for me.  This is why I keep all my blood tests and compare year to year.

At this point you might be thinking "Mama Bean, it's calories in, calories out." 

And I will say, it's not looking like that.  It's looking like maybe it's the type of calories that my body types needs and uses is the issue.  Maybe it's the fact that staying in shape and losing weight are 2 very different things.  Maybe it's because I don't have a history of bad eating habits and not exercising that I can correct to see huge weight gains.  Maybe all that cardio I was doing was actually making it even harder for my body to drop weight.

I am focusing on building muscle by doing interval training.  I keep my heart rate up for 30 minutes while I do back to back reps at a fast pace, with some slow, heavy weights thrown in.  I get my cardio now my lifting with bursts of running.  I am burning almost the same amount (from my heart rate monitor) as I do about 45 minutes into a cardio class.  Per my monitor, my cardio health is improving.  I think it's the bursts.  When I can get back to Zumba schedule wise, I will go because it's fun.

I am hopeful that with building muscle and lowering my sugar intake I can reset my metabolism.  And then I can determine what the right balance is for me.

Detoxing sucks....

From my original, non-diet blog "Mama Bean's World"

 

Detoxing sucks

This probably belongs on my other blog, but I'm too tired to write 2, so I'll post a link.

If you've been following my weight loss issues over the past year, you know it's been a bit of a struggle.  Weight Watchers was not my thing.  I liked the meetings (good to stay focused) but the actual program was having no impact.  I don't drink soda.  We rarely do fast food.  I already exercise.  There really wasn't a lot of "new" stuff to add to create a change for my body to adjust to.  I was getting bitchy every time someone made the assumption that I must be cheating. NO I WAS NOT.  Every morsel was accounted for.  I never went over my points.  It just didn't work for me.

Then Crossfit which was awesome, but as I said when I joined, I wasn't doing it to lose weight, I was doing it to get in shape.

I have to say Crossfit was a great experience.  While I am not going right now due to scheduling conflicts, I learned that I was capable of much more than I was doing.  I can actually, albeit pathetically, run.  Every day it gets easier.  I can also lift considerably more weight than I realized.  Those 60 lbs leg adductor/abductors reps I used to do-- I can do them at 170 lbs.  I even eked out a few at 190 lbs.  This guy annoyed me at the gym because he was chatting with a friend instead of using the pulley-chest press.  I did 10 reps at his weight, thank you very much.  Wimp.  Mama Bean brought it.

HOWEVER, I am well aware that I need to clearly do something about my diet.  I know that I can not exercise the weight off.  It doesn't work that way.  It helps, but it's the food.

I've been reading up a lot on Paleo/Primal eating.  Anyone that I know who does it, swears by it.  And they look healthy, too.  I cut out beans, don't eat much pasta (never really have) and tried to make small adjustments.

Then I stumbled onto a book called "It Starts with Food"- it's a 30 day detox program that basically reintroduces food into a Paleo diet.

No grains.  No sugar.  No alcohol.  No beans.  No caffeine. No dairy.

None.

For 30 days.

It's to reset my insulin.

Somewhere in the book it said that I might experience withdrawal effects.  If I did, it's because this is what the issue is.  And if they are strong, that's an even bigger reason to stick with it- because my body is fighting it.

HOLY CRAP I FEEL LIKE SHIT.

I almost threw up yesterday.  I fell asleep at  9:30 pm.  Dead asleep.  My head is killing me.  I never get headaches.

However, I'm actually kinda excited.  After 15 years of dieting, I think I may have stumbled onto what the actual problem has been!

Woo hoo!

I made myself workout yesterday and about halfway through I felt a little better.

Now you might be asking "What did you cut out to have such a reaction so quickly?"

• Shredded wheat or yogurt for breakfast
• One cup of coffee (yep, ONE)
• Popcorn as a snack
• Cheese on my salad
• Late night chocolate binge (I usually have chocolate chips with some nuts)

That's it.

Nothing awful.  Nothing unhealthy- no donuts, no ice cream (that's a weekend thing), no cakes, no bread (not a big fan), no tacos- nothing crazy.  Yes, I do eat those things, but not normally during the time period that I've been on this.

Last night we had sole crusted with almond flour and pecans, a side of cauliflower "rice" and brussel sprouts.  Not exactly prison food.

Of course, there is the chance that I have the flu, but honestly, the cravings are making me nuts right now.  I'm glad the book warned me about it.

So this was the problem.  My insulin levels.  It all makes sense now.

I am going to stick with this.  I hear by Day 10 I'll be radiant and glowing.  Food will taste better.  Right now I want to kick a puppy.

Apparently, once I get over the hump, the regular weight loss strategies will work better.  A clean slate.

And yes, this is healthy. I'm eating lots of fruits and vegetables.  Lean protein.  It's not a bacon/steak/fried egg diet.  It's a plant based diet with protein for balance.  Not exactly bad stuff.

I think I miss cheese the most.  Sweet, wonderful cheese.  Oh well.

I will keep you all posted on how this turns out... I am not giving up!

But, if you see that I am getting irritated- RUN.

My Crossfit Saga continues....

Last month I was proud to complete my intro class to Crossfit and I completely wimped out and opted to repeat the intro class.  The regular classes frighten me.

Then I realized that holy crap, I actually had to stick with it.  There would be no magic fairy that was going to make this easy.

This realization made me sad.

Over the weekend my husband, father-in-law and I were discussing how former military members make good teachers.  They have realistic expectations, know that sometimes you have to do crap jobs as part of the big picture (a gripe I often have about staff- yes, filing IS part of the job--- unless, of course, you are very pregnant like my assistant was), and in general, they will plow through to get something done.

Crossfit was designed with the military, firefighters, policeman in mind.  People who don't have the option to quit in the middle of their jobs.

I am a financial advisor.  When I have a bad day- you know, the coffee maker breaking, my computer not working 100%-- I can say "Screw it" and head home after 1 pm (the market close time for the west coast).  And I do this.

I am not designed for Crossfit.

This hit me like a ton of bricks during our conversation.  While I perceive myself as NOT a quitter, in some ways I am.  I know how to work out.  I could absolutely recreate the entire work out, get the work out of the day (WOD-- the acronyms crack me up... doing a WOD... c'mon...), and do it myself.  Yet I don't.  I need the coach.  And even then, am I really giving it 100%?

Maybe 85%.

I suck.

When I was in high school I seriously considered the Naval Academy.  I had wanted to be a doctor and they had the best pre-med program out of the military academies and seemed to have the most women.  If I really wanted to be a doctor, the cost of grad school, med school, etc, was too much, so it was pretty much the best option.  My dad is former army, I have many relatives who serve or have served, so it wasn't out of the question or discouraged.  

But the truth was, it would have been too hard for me.  Not academically.  Mentally.  I remember looking at the PT requirements, the daily work-outs and thinking "No.  Way.  Ever."  And even medical school- without the military- seemed like a lot of work (ironically, I have spent more time in school with my graduate school and designations than if I had just gone to med school and done a residency).

It was too much work.

I quit before I started.

Me.  Apparently, the only things I stick with are the things I am good at doing or enjoy.  I bail before I begin at anything that makes me uncomfortable.  I am a chicken.

Coincidentally, on Monday on the whiteboard they had listed 5 places that were hotter than Las Vegas- Afghanistan, Iraq, Oman, Sudan and the deck of an aircraft carrier- and we were only working out for 30 minutes, not 18 months.

My cousin and my many friends that have been served in the Middle East push through every day.  They don't quit.

So now I'm at the fork in the road-- I can forge ahead with something that I am not skilled at and really give it 100% or just call it a day and do something a little less stressful and painful, being grateful for all the people that do have the tenacity to push through and know I am not one of them.

Let's face it, I was jumping rope this morning and felt like I was "dying."  Yet somehow, I could still talk?  

Which Mama Bean do I chose to be? 

And it's not just Crossfit.  This transcends into my life.  Giving it 100%.  All the time.  Every time.

I joke about my lowest common denominator theory- that my 60% IS more than most people's 100%.  

But it's not mine and I know it.

And somewhere in that conversation with my father-in-law and my husband, it sorta slapped me in the face.

I need tenacity.

That is what is holding me back.  Sucking it up through the bad stuff, trudging ahead, brushing it off.

Getting it done.

Yesterday I put on an outfit and it very truly hung off me.  As in too big to keep.  My dress today is baggy.  If you saw me, you might not even notice, but I do.  It's nice.  It will probably keep me going for awhile.  I also know that it won't be consistent and steady.  I might not have another "Wow" moment in the next month or so.

But the real  battle is in my head.  Despite the smile and the jokes (I can't pass on a good snatch joke), I am fighting the voice in my head saying "Why bother? You know you can't do it.  You're not like these people."

As I wrote a few weeks back, this suddenly isn't about losing weight- it's about getting over what got me here in the first place.

I don't want to be the person that quits the second something gets difficult.  

The jury is still out.

And the saga continues...

Apparently, I have to keep going...

Well, I started my second round of the Crossfit intro class.

I guess, in order for this to work I have to KEEP going.  That was not in the brochure.  I had signed up for the magic wand program where I did a few pull-ups after only 4 weeks of training and miraculously a size 8 overnight.

They must have misunderstood my membership plan.

But here's the good news-- I jogged the 200m.  No whining.  No joke.

I even encouraged the people who also politely asked "Can I do something other than run?"

Yep.  I've tried that, too.

And the answer is still apparently no.

I think they might enjoy the torture. 

Rather than have the simple training bar for the deadlifts, as I did on the first day last month, I lifted 65 lbs.  Woo hoo!  My time was about the same, but I that's a big difference. 

I still can't do push-ups and opted for the hand release modified version. 

And for whatever reason, I feel like this next month will solidify what I learned this past month.  And I will start focusing on the primal/paleo diet a little more (after the holiday). 

And then it will be up to me to decide what do to with it.  I've got the tools.  I've got a good plan. 

Now I actually have to stick with it and do it.

I Did It

I finished the "Elements" or intro class to Crossfit. 

I decided to repeat it before jumping in to the real classes.  Because I figure if I take another month to focus on the basics, it will be a little easier.  Because I'm a wimp.  The really fit people scare me a little, to be honest.

Another woman in our class has also decided to repeat again, which makes me feel a little better.  Let's just say neither one of us are spring chickens.

But here's the thing-- we didn't quit.

Don't get me wrong, I seriously considered quitting in the middle of the second week as I was hanging from the pull-up bar envisioning that one day I may actually be able to lift my legs, reflecting on the times when I could do 100 knee lifts and not break a sweat through the first 50.

Hanging. Dangling. Reminiscing. 

Pissed.

Pissed at me for somehow getting in the position where hanging on was the best I could bring.

Pissed at the sad looks I got from the others in the class.

Pissed at the coach for clapping my achievement of simply not falling from the bar.

Really?

Hey.  I am better than this.

So as I hung there like deer meat waiting to be processed,I decided not to quit.

Okay, maybe not right then.  Maybe it was on the drive home. Or that night. Or whenever the humiliation finally subsided.

Regardless, I didn't quit.  Neither did the other woman.

And while I may not be moving on to superfitdom any time soon, I am not going back.

No, I lost no weight.  Not a pound.

But...

My clothes are loose.

I helped my parents move last week.  I was lifting and moving things like a pro. 

I carried 30 pounds of dog food in from the car today like it was nothing.

I'll take it.

I will proudly repeat the intro class.

Because I will not quit. 

I may suck.  A lot.  For a long time. 

But I will not quit.

What is This Crossfit of Which You Speak?

Reposted from "Mama Bean's World"

I started doing Crossfit 3 weeks ago.  I've been posting about my trials and tribulations on Facebook and have mentioned it in this blog and my weight loss blog.

But on a regular basis I get asked "What exactly IS Crossfit?"

Crossfit uses natural body movements and resistance to build a core level of fitness that can be utilized in daily activities as well as sports.

Okay, so what is it really?

There is limited equipment use- pull up bars, kettel bells, barbells, dumbbells, gymnastic rings, rowing machines, boxes and bands.  Many of the exercises are simple ones from PE class- burpees, push ups, sit ups and squats.

There is a Workout of the Day (WOD) that is on the whiteboard.  (The workouts are often named after women-- which is what caught my attention.  My former high school principal would post that he did 8 reps of Mary.  I would comment "Did you at least buy her dinner?") They are either time based (AMRAP)-- as many rounds as possible during set time period or round based-- 6 rounds and going for your best time.

The workouts vary daily- and I mean vary.  I am currently taking a beginner intro class, so much of our class is spent on technique.  The gym that I go to (or box as they call it), the coaches are very into making sure you do it right.  All of the exercises can be scaled down-- sometimes not enough for me, to be honest.

We started the day with a 400m Indian Run (which I opted to walk and save my tribe, but through their encouragement joined back into).  Then we did band exercises for the remaining warm up.  The actual work out, after reviewing the techniques were 20, 15, 10 thrusters (barbell squats to an overhead push press) alternating with 10, 15, 20 kettel bell swings.

What I really like about it is that while I am sore, I am never hurt.  The varying workouts are logically designed and coordinated so that I work everything during the week without overfocusing on one exercise (which I do when I work out on my own).

So that's the basics.

Now MY version of Crossfit is a little different.

It involves moaning, whining, and figuring out the lowest/easiest form of what ever the exercise is.  I never thought I could jump 18 inches onto a box.  I can.  I still cannot do a pull up, but I can do modified dips on the rings far better than I could have imagined.

I giggle when they use the term snatch.  I'm sorry.  It's funny.

I often roll my eyes.

I described burpees to one unsuspecting classmate as "the thing that coaches make you do when you piss them off."  No, it is NOT an opportunity to further enhance your athleticism, although that was a lovely way for our coach to put it.

When I was doing kettel bell swings and the coach said I needed to pop and explode my hips more,  I couldn't keep as straight face as he demonstrated a fierce hip thrust.  I kept thinking "I've been married 10 years-- my hips stopped doing that a long time ago..."  (my husband doesn't think that's funny, by the way...).

I am a bad Crossfitter.

I haven't lost any weight, shockingly.  But what I have noticed is my clothes are looser and more importantly, when I was helping my parents move last week, I was insanely stronger.  I lifted things, twisted more smoothly-- I was stunned.  Last year at this time, I was on the couch recovering from surgery after having spending the large portion of the spring in constant back pain.   I couldn't bend over to tie my shoes, let alone lift a 50 lb box.

What a difference a year makes.

To the other crossfitters I'm probably just an old, fat chick slowing them down.  To me, I'm fighting from the inside out.  No, hanging from the pull up bar for 30 seconds was not as great as doing 7 knee ups, but it really IS the best I've got as humiliating as it is. And last year, I wouldn't have lasted 10 seconds.  Or even tried.

I'm scared to death to try the "real" class next week.  I'm afraid I'm in over my head.

But I am going to try.  With my sarcastic bubble over my head, of course.

Because the strange thing is, as terrible as I am at it (and trust me, I am TERRIBLE), it's a bit addicting.  I was warned that it was cultish.  It is.  It's not fun, but it feels more like play.  A torturous, hellish play, but still it's a game-- beat your times, beat your rounds.  It's inherently self-competitive without being competitive with others.  My balance is getting better.  My core is stronger.  I'm sleeping better.

It appears that it works. No matter how bad I am, it's still working.  I've decided to stay off the scale for the remainder of the summer.  I want to be fit.  Besides, even if I never lose a pound, I still need to exercise for the rest of my life. 

So that's what Crossfit is. In a way, it's become a personal quest for me to just be able to do the work outs.  I think it's something different to everyone.  It's not just an exercise class.  That doesn't even begin to describe it.

If you're looking into it, don't wait.  Give it a shot.  It is difficult.  It is overwhelming.  But until you've done it, you won't understand.

Running

Reposted from my blog "Mama Bean's World"
 

I don't like to run.

At all.

It is not fun to me.

Now you can try and convince me that it's great exercise.

Sure.

Because every great exercise starts with me groaning, bitching and wishing I were dead.

I get that some people find it exciting.  They like to beat their times.  They find it relaxing.

I do not.

For whatever reason, I cannot run.  I mean, if an axe murderer were chasing me, I probably could.  But it would have to be a big axe.  Really big.

I think the reason my ancestors IQ's developed is because we were too slow to outrun the bear and were therefore forced to figure out ways to outsmart the bear.

My slowness has clearly benefited me.

But yet with this new Crossfit thing, I am being forced to learn to run.

I very seriously can walk faster.  No joke.

I have a big, fat butt.  I have skinny, weak ankles.

Explain to me why it's a good thing to force the issue?

Everyone I know seems to be running marathons or half marathons.

I run errands.

I did "run" a 5k.  A kindergarten class beat me.  They were juicing.   Capri Sun. Not the waters, the full juice.  The hard stuff.  And I am NOT making this up.

So I plod and waddle along.  I hear that someday I may enjoy it.

Don't hold your breath.